Chasing..

Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Girl-friend??

Was walking to the bus stop with Kay Eng ytd after we went for gym (after work). Well.. It was a long walk as we do not wanna take the short-cut through the field cuz our legs will get itchy if we do.. Anyway, we were talking abt girlfriends.. Wat we like our future gf to be like (since we are both still single)... Haha...

Ha.. Shall not go into the details of wat kinda gals we will go for cuz such things change over time...

Anyway, another qn he posed to me was "do u have any targets in mind now?". My answer was a "No". Ha.. In my heart, I am in a sense thankful of it. Cuz I feel tt I'm still quite "unstable" matters of the heart. And because of this, I had been a jerk (as Shi Qi termed such guys) in the past.... I always backed out at the last min.. Did I hurt anyone? I dunno........ But I damn sure tt I dun wanna do such stupid things again... Thus no love interest = good thing... For now at least... haha... until i'm rdy... wonder when tt day will come though....

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Great Singapore Sale & a Nice Exhibit (Edited)

Went to Orchard early this morning with my mom & sis... Ha.. Shopped a lot today and had lunch at Thai Express (again in a month, twice with Sharon & co and today).. I think I'm gonna get sick of it le.... In fact, I'm already quite sick of my favourite soft-shell crab with rice... Anyway, managed to buy a red collared (Yes, Weili! Collared) tee from Quicksilver.. Wanted to get white but I guess I simply have too many white tees.... As dictated by my mom, I'll have to keep it for CNY... :( Planning in advance sia lah.... well... Not tt I'm complaining.... haha...

Anyway, juz to let u ppls know, Prints (the cool card shop in Paragon & CityLink) is having a sale.. Dunno abt the one in CityLink but the outlet in Paragon is having sale till early June.. Forgot the exact date le.... haha... I once had the tot of buying organisers and notebooks of the same colour as my bag from tt shop... For example, my current bag is orange, thus when I go uni, I planned (past tense) to buy orange notebooks from tt shop... Well.. After much consideration, I feel tt it'll be too much of an "overkill" in terms of colour...

By the way, I stumbled upon this nice exhibition in the Library@Orchard by coincidence.. The title is "Small Eyes, Big Picture". It is basically a photo exhibition by a few (I only saw 4) architecture students from NUS (Yes! My future sch!) get together to tell stories of their adventures through Asia. It is set in such a way tt u "follow" their journeys through countries such as Japan, China, Cambodia, Thailand, India & Pakistan via maps, photos, videos, sketches and mementos. Well.. I find it really cool and my desire to visit countries like China, Thailand and India greatly increased after veiwing the exhibitions. I muz admit tt I was biased against touring these countries... Just felt tt I shld save more $ and travel to places further away... However, some of the photos made me change my opinion..... haha... Oh!! Forgot to mention... The exhibit will end on 5th Jun, I tink....

A nice quote from one of the exhibit, "it is the people who will make the experience of visiting a place a memorable one.." sth like tt....

Friday, May 27, 2005

Eat with Your Family Day...

Today is Eat with Your Family Day.. In truth, how many times do you eat with your family in a week? Me, once or twice on weekends... And what are the topics of discussion we usually have? None in particular... Sometimes we joked, sometimes we share some small gossips, sometimes we eat in silence and sometimes my dad can't take a joke or tries to find fault..... I dislike the last one.. I juz lose the mood to eat when someone yell on the dining table.. I mean it's ok to be angry and still converse normally rather than yell.. My dad is one who would do tt and I totally dislike he's lack of maturity even in the pressence of my sis's bf... He simply gets angry as and when he likes... He acts as though he owns the family cuz he is the breadwinner... Stupid anicent mindset..... Well.. despite tt, he is not exactly a bad father to begin with... U can't choose ur parents, can u? haha.. But u can choose urself........ This is my belief.....

anyway, I feel tt despite all the jokes and stuffs, nth serious comes across on the dining table... We don't talk abt sch, work or any other family bonding matters on the table... Sometimes we simply sit and eat in silence... Well... I suppose there wasn't any habits of speaking on the table cuz my dad was even more immature in the past and family dinners juz plain sucked... At least now, we do have family dinners which are juz fine...... Ha.. Wo yi xin man yi zhu le.... (I'm satisfied le)...


Lyrics for "I'll Be There For You" - Bon Jovi

Ha.. On a light note, bet u guys have seen the trailer to the movie A Lot About Love (LINK).. After watching the trailer twice, the song caught me and I found out tt the song tt guy was singing is "I'll Be There For You" by Bon Jovi.. Being a Bon Jovi fan only after their recent 2 albums, I didn't know abt it... Hahaha... Pathetic sia... Maybe I shld buy some of their older albums to listen... haha... Below is the lyrics for the song..

"I guess this time you're really leaving
I heard your suitcase say goodbye
And as my broken heart lies bleeding
You say true love is suicide

You say you're cried a thousand rivers
And now you're swimming for the shore
You left me drowning in my tears
And you won't save me anymore

Now I'm praying to God you'll
Give me one more chance, girl

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breathe I want to
Be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you

I know you know we've
Had some good times
How they have their own hiding place
I can promise you tomorrow
But I can't buy back yesterday

And Baby you know my hands are dirty
But I wanted to be your valentine
I'll be the water when you get thirsty
When you get drunk, I'll be the wine

I'll be there for you
These five words I'd swear to you
When you breathe I want to
Be the air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you

And I wasn't there when
You were happy
I wasn't there when you were down
I didn't mean to miss your birthday, baby
I wish I'd seen you blow those candles out

I'll be there for you
These five words I'd swear to you
When you breathe I want to be
The air for you
I'll be there for you
I'd live and I'd die for you
Steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what a love can do
I'll be there for you"

by Bon Jovi
from New Jersey

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

The Darkest Episode: Star Wars Episode 3..

Caught it on Monday with Joel.. Well.. I find the dialogues by the characters kinda dull and emotionless... But the effects and the actions made up for it all.

My personal opinion is tt the show deals absolutes like most of blockbusters, shows, cartoons etc. In short, as do all fairytales. However, I feel tt Anakin Skywalker (be4 he turned to the dark side) is the "reality" to it all. He was like all of us brought up believing in absolutes: right vs wrong. Yet, as he progressed along in the show, he learnt tt not all good are good and not all bad are bad. For example, Mace Windu (Samuel L. Jackson) requested tt he spy on the Chancellor. It is going against the honour and code of being a Jedi Knight but it is coming from Jedi Master (more senior in the Jedi Chain). Is tt good? In addition, according to the Jedis, to care for one and try to protect the love ones is bad but in truth, how bad is it to cherish your loved ones? Thus as the story flows, he was seduced to the dark side.

Another "reality" of the show is the massacre of the Jedis. As George Lucas directed (not forgetting tt it's juz a movie), the Jedis did not even have a chance to fight back. They were simply backstabbed or sabottaged. In addition, the "younglings" were not spared and were simply killed off. I feel tt he could have extended the film by another hr to include such scenes but he chose to instil a sense of hopelessness. I feel tt this is a reality as opposed to the fantasy we have been brought up to believe. There is no honour in war, you backstab, sabotage and do anything despicable to win it. the same goes to our working world.. Sad to say... Sad to acknowledge...

Another "reality" is the theme of fate and its ironies. There was no way to save of the Padme. The only way Anakin knew how to save Padme turned out to the very cause of her death. Thus is it true tt our destiny is in our hands? Or is fate still a power we cannot hope to win?

Well.. This is wat I feel tt makes the episode the darkest amongst the 6 episodes. It is the "reality" in the show. No doubt it eventually unfolds to yet another absolute in the final episode, Luke & Anakin destroying the empire (Good will win against evil), I feel tt George Lucas was still young and naive when he created original trilogy as compared to now.
Ha... Cynical? Anyway, changed the quote on the 1st page....

Monday, May 23, 2005

The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom

Ha.. I am practically sitting, staring & waiting for my lunch to be ready now. So I shall blog abt this bk I read juz ytd. Well.. It's really thin so I completed it within a day...

My point of view is that the main theme abt the story is abt people. How we are all connected to each other, how we can affect ppl who may not even know us (and we may not even know tt we are affecting them). I shall elaborate. The story is abt Eddie (Maintenance) who had been working most of his life (before and after taking part in the war) in a theme park called Ruby Pier. He eventually died at 87 when one of the machines fell and he saved a gal's life by pushing her out of the way. Thus he went to Heaven and met 5 different ppl.

1. A Blue Guy (Stranger)
2. Eddie's captain during wartime
3. Ruby - The lady the Pier was named after (Stranger)
4. Eddie's late wife
5. A young gal who died during the war and was in a sense casued by him. (Stranger)

Well.. Of the 5, 3 are total strangers, yet they do in one way or another crossed Eddie's life and have sth to tell him or teach him... Personally, I feel tt the links are not strong but u do get his pt tt lives intersects.....

There are other themes too but oh well... My lunch is rdy... hahaha....

Anyway, be4 I go, New Blogskin! I searched for abt an hr and I ended up with this... haha... N I removed the music too.. cuz I'm using mozilla and I can not hear the music at all...

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Class Gathering & NS (CAA 230505)

Haha... U must be wondering how these 2 topics link... Well.. U'll see...

Had a clz gathering at China Square Central's Vila'ge. Well.. The usual ppl were there, like Xin Ru, Weili, Yun Han, Hiang Kiat, Ting Jun, Candice, Shi Qi, Liang Wei & Zhong Wei.. Only Rex & Li Quan seemed to be at the gathering for the 1st time (as I recall).. Anyway, good to meet all of them. Despite having slightly below 50% of the clz at the gathering, I feel that everyone's presence and (some of their) effort to attend the gathering made it (in my own terms) successful.. I dunno why but today, I truly appreciate them (those who attended and those who tries to attend but cannot do so). Not tt I dun feel so in the past but I feel strongly abt it today. Maybe affected by the book I juz finish reading? "The Five People You Meet In Heaven"? Haha.. Shall talk abt it tmr or sth... Have some gan xiang but hasn't exactly materialise....

Anyway, we talked abt several issues today... We have changed in a certain sense.. We used to simply crap ard but today, we talked abt (among the topics) being 20 and still not having any achievements in life... wat shld we do in the next five yrs? haha... My stand is clear. My life is on pause now. I will resume only after 16 Jun 06. Meanwhile, I shall try to improve myself by reading on books which I will not have the time to read when I go to studies (WeiLi, Thanks in advance arh.. haha)..

We left The Vila'ge at ard 2130.. and walked to Chinatown cuz Candice and Ting Jun wanted to go to the cheap CD shop but it was closed. Thus we separated & left for home thereafter. I took 190 with Rex, WeiLi & Shi Qi.. Basically, our topic revolves ard jerks in Uni (according to Shi Qi0 and assholes in NS.. Well.. As Shi Qi described jerks (basically, guys who jio gals but later did not bother to remain in contact with the gal), I felt a sense of guilt as I was one of them... However, I was stupid and I did not know wat I wanted. I still do not know wat I want now but I know tt I do not wanna be a jerk again...

On to NS, we talked abt the various types of assholes we see during our NS. Egoistic, selfish, back-stabbing, etc. As a personal opinion and Shi Qi mentioned tt her bf expressed the same opinion, poly students are in a sense less of such flaws and are easier befriend and beter to work with. Of course, I am not talking abt those who smoke, gamble, are ah bengs etc. But those who are moderate in poly... Well.. I suppose I know of such because I am a JC student and I mix more with JC students. If I were a poly student in NS, I wld probably mix more wth poly students and tend to see more of their flaws...

Anyway, I dislike NS (not tt I'm in the best position to say this cuz I'm slacking my NS away). I hate it for the ppl I have to face, for how irresponsible it is to leave my life in commanders who are only a yr older than me, for how ugly I have became cuz I cannot tolerate assholes anymore and for the 2 yrs & 4 mths I have to waste to go thru all these rubbish. I don't like to bitch.. I never did like it... I dislike the cycle of bitching behind ppls' back.. However, I learnt to do so in NS as I simply can't tolerate the number of assholes I meet in NS (PS: If u are reading this, dun worry.. U r probably not one of the assholes I'm talking abt). Because of my dislike for the cycle of bitching, I felt ugly everytime I cldn't control myself n start bitching abt assholes... Well.. I have to admit.. It felt good to finally bitch abt the assholes u meet... But still, I felt ugly there after....
However, much as I dislike all these... I muz admit tt it's a good lesson..... I learn many things in NS and many of which, I won't get to learn in clz rooms.. From my boss (now) and some of the ppl I meet in NS, I learn abt ppl.. I learn valuable lessons like how to treat ppl... How to Zhuo Ren... well.. there are always so many ways to look at a thing...

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Passed My Driving Test!!!

Haha... Finally passed!!

Anyway, saw a guy who failed and he was begging the tester to allow him to pass.. Makes me wonder... Wat if I were to fail again? Would I do the same? Hmm.. I doubt so cuz I'm too proud... But then again, if circumstances are such tt I cannot retake the test, I might juz do the same... haha... U never really know what u will do unless u r in a certain position at a certain pt in time..

Oh! Probably cuz I was too stress last nite or sth... Had the weirdest dream... Dreamt abt her... But for some reason, I do not have the courage to face her... I ran away... hahaha... Like how I avoided her for so long so long ago. But I eventually plucked up the courage in the end... haha.. bad memories, huh? I suppose I'm still living in my past when I am always telling myself to move on...

Anyway, I shall not let a stupid dream dampen my happiness of getting my driving licence.. haha.. actually, now only have a receipt.. haha... muz wait for the licence to come...

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

"Good friends offer support in times of humiliation but great friends do not talk abt it"
"Good friends offer help in times of need but great friends do not take 'no' for an answer"

Here are 2 quotes (or rather, wat I tot they say) from Desperate Housewives. Food for thought...

Sunday, May 15, 2005

Kingdom Of Heaven

Went to watch this movie with Jia Ming, Timo, Xiu Yun, Qian Hui & Sherman. We had lunch be4 tt at Thai Express (Yes, again) in J8. Qin Yi & Sharon were there for lunch but both left for work after tt. Anyway, the show was TRULY kinda boring during the 1st 30 mins - 1 hr. However, the actions after tt were great.

On a more serious note, I feel tt the theme is "what is religion to men?". In the show, religion has been manipulated to be the reason to fight wars, to take lives. Thus I always ask myself this qn, "How can ppl still believe despite all the bloodstains?" My opinion, ppl needs the spiritual support a religion can provide. And for this reason, a religion can be so powerful and all. A single city can worth everything or none because of it. Ppl can spend thousands, close to millions of dollars juz to purchase a tablet or a place in a temple.

Personally, I cannot bring myself to believe in absolutes. Thus I do not believe tt a single religion is the"truth". To me, religions are juz created by men to give reason, order etc. And being man-made, they are interpreted differently by different ppl. Thus the various forms of religion we see. I feel tt all are true in their own respective sense but they can not be The Truth. However, these are based on the assumption tt there is a god.

Haha.. this argument cannot have a conclusion. I feel that there are ppl like me who do not believe in religions. And the price of our disbelieve is tt we will forever be in this dark & long tunnel, searching in vain for the way out. We will only see the light when we die.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Advice to a Friend (Edited)

Monday, May 09, 2005

Prostate Cancer!

Haha!! Somehow I can see the grin on ur faces as u guys say, "Hey.. I knew u were gg to speak on such a topic!" Haha.. I got quite curious abt this when I came across it quite some time ago & the late Dr. Wee died of this. Haha.. Thus I did a little bit of researching and this is wat I got off "Medline Plus" - A service of U.S. National Library of Medicine and the National Institute of Health.

I quote:

What is the prostate?

The prostate is a gland in the male reproductive system. The prostate makes and stores a component of semen and is located near the bladder and the rectum. The prostate surrounds part of the urethra, the tube that empties urine from the bladder. A healthy prostate is about the size of a walnut. If the prostate grows too large, the flow of urine can be slowed or stopped.

What is prostate cancer?

Except for skin cancer, cancer of the prostate is the most common malignancy in American men. It is estimated that nearly 221,000 men in the United States will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2003. In most men with prostate cancer, the disease grows very slowly. The majority of men with low-grade, early prostate cancer (confined to the gland) live a long time after their diagnosis. Even without treatment, many of these men will not die of the prostate cancer, but rather will live with it until they eventually die of some other, unrelated cause. Nevertheless, nearly 29,000 men will die of prostate cancer in 2003.

Who is at risk for prostate cancer?

All men are at risk. The most common risk factor is age. More than 70 percent of men diagnosed with prostate cancer each year are over the age of 65. African American men have a higher risk of prostate cancer than white men. Dramatic differences in the incidence of prostate cancer are also seen in different countries, and there is some evidence that a diet higher in fat, especially animal fat, may account for some of these differences. Genetic factors also appear to play a role, particularly for families in whom the diagnosis is made in men under 60 years of age. The risk of prostate cancer rises with the number of close relatives who have the disease.

What are the symptoms of prostate cancer?

Prostate cancer often does not cause symptoms for many years. By the time symptoms occur, the disease may have spread beyond the prostate. When symptoms do occur, they may include:

• Frequent urination, especially at night
  
  
• Inability to urinate
  
  
• Trouble starting or holding back urination
  
  
• A weak or interrupted flow of urine
  
  
• Painful or burning urination
  
  
• Blood in the urine or semen
  
  
• Painful ejaculation
  
  
• Frequent pain in the lower back, hips, or upper thighs

These can be symptoms of cancer, but more often they are symptoms of noncancerous conditions. It is important to check with a doctor.

What other prostate conditions can cause symptoms like these?

As men get older, their prostate may grow bigger and block the flow of urine or interfere with sexual function. This common condition, called benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH), is not cancer, but can cause many of the same symptoms as prostate cancer. Although BPH may not be a threat to life, it may require treatment with medicine or surgery to relieve symptoms. An infection or inflammation of the prostate, called prostatitis, may also cause many of the same symptoms as prostate cancer. Again, it is important to check with a doctor.

Can prostate cancer be found before a man has symptoms?

Yes. Two tests can be used to detect prostate cancer in the absence of any symptoms. One is the digital rectal exam (DRE), in which a doctor feels the prostate through the rectum to find hard or lumpy areas. The other is a blood test used to detect a substance made by the prostate called prostate specific antigen (PSA). Together, these tests can detect many �silent� prostate cancers, those that have not caused symptoms.

At present, however, it is not known whether routine screening saves lives. The benefits of screening and local therapy (surgery or radiation) remain unclear for many patients. Because of this uncertainty, the National Cancer Institute is currently supporting research to learn more about screening men for prostate cancer. Currently, researchers are conducting a large study to determine whether screening men using a blood test for PSA and a DRE can help reduce the death rate from this disease. They are also assessing the risks of screening. Full results from this study, the Prostate, Lung, Colorectal, and Ovarian Cancer Screening Trial or PLCO, are expected by 2015.

How reliable are the screening tests for prostate cancer?

Neither of the screening tests for prostate cancer is perfect. Most men with mildly elevated PSA levels do not have prostate cancer, and many men with prostate cancer have normal levels of PSA. Also, the DRE can miss many prostate cancers. The DRE and PSA test together are better than either test alone in detecting prostate cancer.

How is prostate cancer diagnosed?

The diagnosis of prostate cancer can be confirmed only by a biopsy. During a biopsy, a urologist (a doctor who specializes in diseases of urinary and sex organs in men, and urinary organs in women) removes tissue samples, usually with a needle. This is generally done in the doctor�s office with local anesthesia. Then a pathologist (a doctor who identifies diseases by studying tissues under a microscope) checks for cancer cells.

Prostate cancer is described by both grade and stage.

• Grade describes how closely the tumor resembles normal prostate tissue. Based on the microscopic appearance of tumor tissue, pathologists may describe it as low-, medium-, or high-grade cancer. One way of grading prostate cancer, called the Gleason system, uses scores of 2 to 10. Another system uses G1 through G4. In both systems, the higher the score, the higher the grade of the tumor. High-grade tumors generally grow more quickly and are more likely to spread than low-grade tumors.
  
  
• Stage refers to the extent of the cancer. Early prostate cancer, stages I and II, is localized. It has not spread outside the gland. Stage III prostate cancer, often called locally advanced disease, extends outside the gland to the seminal vesicles. Stage IV means the cancer has spread to lymph nodes and/or to other tissues or organs.

How is localized prostate cancer treated?

Three treatment options are generally accepted for men with localized prostate cancer: radical prostatectomy, radiation therapy, and surveillance (also called watchful waiting).

• Radical prostatectomy is a surgical procedure to remove the entire prostate gland and nearby tissues. Sometimes lymph nodes in the pelvic area (the lower part of the abdomen, located between the hip bones) are also removed. Radical prostatectomy may be performed using a technique called nerve-sparing surgery that may prevent damage to the nerves needed for an erection.
  
  
• Radiation therapy involves the delivery of radiation energy to the prostate. The energy is usually delivered in an outpatient setting using an external beam of radiation. The energy can also be delivered by implanting radioactive seeds in the prostate using a needle.
  
  
• Surveillance, taking a wait-and-see approach, may be recommended for patients with early-stage prostate cancer, particularly those who are older or have other serious medical conditions. These patients have regular examinations. If there is evidence of cancer growth, active treatment may be recommended.

- Unquote

Basically, this is the website I went to.. For you GUYS out there who wants to know more, pls take a look...

Saturday, May 07, 2005

Haircut.

Went for my monthly haircut this afternoon and was so glad tt I did not have to wait for a long time be4 getting it. In fact, I got it the moment I stepped at the door of the barber (not the EC House). Hmm.. Kinda like tt shop cuz they took photos of their past customers (usually kids and ppl with funny hair styles) and pasted them onto the wall.. thus everytime I go for one, I made it a pt to put on my contacts be4 gg (haha.. I have to take of my specs if otherwise and I'll be blind). Thus when my hair is being cut, I'll view the photos... i feel tt the fact tt the ppl are willing to pose for the photos, shows tt the shop gives a really welcoming (not necessary the best hair-cut) service.. Why am I saying all these???? Cuz I juz found out tt they are moving to Ten Mile Junction... Well.. it is still close to my hse and I may still go to them but still.... it's kinda sad in a way which I can't adequately explain.. lost of memories????

However, experiences over the last few mths have led me to feel tt, yes, things changes over time.. Building restructures, ppl moves, etc. BUT it is the ppl tt have the magic to keep things the same or at least make u feel so.

Haha.. I tink I'm being too idle to come up with such tots... Since the day I swore off gaming, MANY sucky & stupid tots starts to enter my mind... then i remembered why I turned to gaming in the 1st place...........

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Short Interest Span

As I was commenting to Cedric the other day while we were out for the movie, I feel tt I have a very very short interest span (is there such a phrase?). Hmm.. I muz say tt in recent yrs, there are very few drama serials tt keep me captivated to the very end of the whole serial. Of the many tt I gave up watching, I simply got bored and I rather spend my time doing sth else (not tt I have anything constructive to spend my time on).

To make matters worse, recently, I got hooked onto MMORPG (online games). Oh well.. It was interesting at the beginning but I eventually got tired of the many games tt I tried cuz there was simply NO storyline to keep me captivated. thus ending my so-called "career" in online gaming.. Ytd, I juz swore off normal gaming (i dunno how long this is gg to last but I did swear off gaming) cuz I got very sick of playing Fire Emblem after spending abt a mth on it (but I completed it be4 I stopped).

Kinda sucky huh? However, I find tt the amazing thing abt it all is tt, I have never got sick of studying or my work as a clerk. Maybe it's because I already have a mindset tt no matter how boring they are, they are things tt I'll have to go thru eventually.

Anyway, I think tt this is a major character problem tt I have to look into and Cedric did agree with me. Sigh.. How do you solve such a problem?

On a lighter note, since I swore off gaming ytd, i am able to dedicate more time to other things tt are more constructive. haha...

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Vulgarities...

Hmm.. i dunno y but recently, I juz have a sick feeling of disgust when I hear ppl scolding, writing or even using short forms vulgarities...... it happened when one of my frenz was emailing me and complaining abt his workload... And he kept using those short forms.... i juz got this feeling of discomfort when listening to them... haha.. this is especially so for hokkien vulgarities...

the sad thing is tt I too scold vugarities when I'm angry and I feel sick of myself when I use those words to express my anger... Is it tt i am so incapable of expressing myself tt I must use those words???? haha... I hope not....

Oh well.... Instead of complaing abt others, I tink I shld change myself 1st and be more capable of expressing myself... Or even better, to control my temper... haha... *perspires* difficult sia lah....

Sunday, May 01, 2005

Gathering......

haha.. Went for Hui Yin's BBQ ytd.. haha.. Fun.. Got to meet up with Xin Ru, Wendy, Bok, Hui Yin (of course) and Weili (we meet up quite often lah.. but still, we met ytd..).. Xin Ru, Weili and myself reached at ard 1845.. haha.. Cld have been earlier if not for the fact tt I needed to find a solid backing to write on the B-day card & somehow leading to our Ms. Lim losing her sense of direction there.. Anyway, we met Hui Yin, her family members & her sec sch frenz.. Well.. I wld say tt her sis is quite good looking... BUT as I have repeated many times ytd, I am NOT as desperate as I may sound... Cuz our main stream of topic mainly revolves abt singlehood and a*hem another guy's plan to join XXX in future.... hahahahahhaa... :) But to the other guy, I tink I see things from ur view and agreed, can go..... BUT I'm definitely NOT gg to a*hem a*hem there cuz "I am NOT as desperate as I may sound".. Well.. gals juz dun see things this way..............

anyway, somehow we didn't interact with Hui Yin's sec frenz initially.. Only did tt after Wendy & Bok came along.. haha.. Played the description game.. I dunno it's name but basically, u get 5 words and u r supposed to communicate to ur teammates and they r to guess the word.. (but u get to speak).. haha.. I tink I was pretty lame during tt... Cuz i got the word "breast stroke" and I dunno wat I was thinking.. haha.. I wasn't thinking abt it as a full word.. haha.. So I stupidly talked abt "breast" and "stroke" separately.. haha.. So basically, as Bok said, "typical guys way of thinking".... haha...

anyway, we left at ard 2230 and I went to PS to find Cedric to watch "Wet Dreams".. Well.. It was funny in a certain sense but I juz don't find it really nice, i dun even feel tt the gals are chio (maybe cuz Koreans and Singaporeans got very diff tastes..) and I feel tt some jokes are exaggerated to the pt tt they are lame...

i AM myself
Name: Kenneth aka Ah_Ken
DOB: 14 Jul 85
Current Status: Mugging my life away in NUS. Life is a BIG deception!
Residence: Bt Panjang
Likes: Chocolate, Soft Shell Crab (Cuz I'm LAZY), Shopping, Slacking, Reading Manga.. Dislikes: None I can think of at the moment..
Short Term Dream: Get my ass to France for SEP at least.
Long Term Dream: A nice condominium at Marina Bay or in Orchard cuz... very atas la!!
Description: Just ur average guy...

your voice

quotes

"You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true." - Dr. Meredith Grey from Grey's Anatomy

'How happy is the little Stone
That rambles in the Road alone,
And doesn't care about Careers
And Exigencies never fears-
Whose Coat of elemental Brown
A passing Universe put on,
And independent as the Sun
Associates or glows alone,
Fulfilling absolute Decree
In casual simplicity-' - How happy is the little Stone by Emily Dickinson

'This is your last chance.
After this, there is no turning back.
You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe.
You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.' - Morpheus, The Matrix

'The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.
Not because you'll get it, but because you're doomed not to want it if you do.' - Unknown

'There are plenty of people with good intentions who take the wrong actions in the end' - Gundam Seed Destiny

'Life is no straight and easy corridor along
which we must seek our way,
lost and confused, now and again
checked in a blind alley.

But always, if we have faith,
a door will open for us,
not perhaps one that we ourselves
would ever have thought of,
but one that will ultimately
prove good for us.' - A.J.Cronin

"Every life has one true-love snapshot
Strangers are just family you have yet to come to know
No life is a waste.
The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone"

"A man can endure alot if he still has hope." - Clyde T. Ellis

" 'Appreciate It.' 2 simple words. A life span of gratitude." - Cinderella Man

"A boxer enters the ring alone. If knocked down, he alone could pick himself up and keep the fight going." - Cinderella Man

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt

"Jame J. Braddock: I know this isn't what you wanted. But I can't win if you're not behind me.
Mae: I'm always behind you."

"People die in fairy tales all the time." - Max Baer, Cinderella Man

"Maybe sometimes people need to see someone do it so they can do it." - Father Rorick, Cinderella Man

"You always got ot figure you're not the best man in the world, there might be somebody better. That's the way it was. That's the way boxing is. The champion don't always stand up. There's always somebody coming up to take him. That's a part of life." - Jame J. Braddock

"If either man falls through weakness or otherwise, he must get up unassisted" - The Queensbury Rules, No. 4

"All men have fears, but the brave put down their fears and go forward, sometimes to death, but always to victory" - Motto of the King's Guard in Ancient Greece

"With each passing day in a good marriage, the love for your spouse grow stronger than the day before" - Cinderella Man

"I take responsibility" - President George W. Bush

"Sow a Thought, and you reap an Act;
Sow an Act, and you reap a Habit;
Sow a Habit, and you sow a Character;
Sow a Character, and you reap a Destiny." - Samuel Smiles

"Our doubts are traitors,
And make us lose the good we oft might win
By fearing to attempt - Shakespeare in Measure of Measure

"What does your heart tell you?" - Aragorn, LOTR

"To an outstretched hand we shall respond with an olive branch, but we shall fight fire with the harshest fire ever." - Israeli PM Ariel Sharon

"To deny our own impulses is to deny the very thing that makes us human. " - The Matrix

"Be without fear in the face of your enemies. Be brave and upright that God may love thee. Speak the truth, always, even if it leads to your death. Safeguard the helpless and do no wrong. That is your oath." - Balian of Ibelin, Kingdom of Heaven

"You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... Until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it." - Atticus Finch, To Kill A Mockingbird

"It is not our abilities that show what we truly are... it is our choices." - Dumbledore, Harry Potter

"Do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment. Even the very wise cannot see all ends." - Gandalf, LOTR

"Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind. Or forgotten." - Lilo & Stitch

"Your heart is free. Have the courage to follow it." - Malcolm Wallace, Braveheart

"Every man dies, not every man really lives." - William Wallace, Braveheart

credits.
rebelHEART host blogskins Miss M brushes

the past
01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005
08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005
09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005
12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006
02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006
03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006
04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007
06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007
07/01/2007 - 08/01/2007
08/01/2007 - 09/01/2007
09/01/2007 - 10/01/2007
10/01/2007 - 11/01/2007
11/01/2007 - 12/01/2007
12/01/2007 - 01/01/2008
01/01/2008 - 02/01/2008
02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008
03/01/2008 - 04/01/2008
05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008
06/01/2008 - 07/01/2008
07/01/2008 - 08/01/2008
08/01/2008 - 09/01/2008
09/01/2008 - 10/01/2008
10/01/2008 - 11/01/2008
11/01/2008 - 12/01/2008
12/01/2008 - 01/01/2009
01/01/2009 - 02/01/2009
02/01/2009 - 03/01/2009
03/01/2009 - 04/01/2009
04/01/2009 - 05/01/2009
05/01/2009 - 06/01/2009
06/01/2009 - 07/01/2009
07/01/2009 - 08/01/2009
09/01/2009 - 10/01/2009
10/01/2009 - 11/01/2009
11/01/2009 - 12/01/2009
12/01/2009 - 01/01/2010
01/01/2010 - 02/01/2010
02/01/2010 - 03/01/2010
06/01/2010 - 07/01/2010
07/01/2010 - 08/01/2010

entries;

myself;

shouts;

quotes;

my past;