Monday, June 12, 2006
Emotionally DetachedMy grandmother was hospitalised last evening. When my mother got back from visiting her, she told me that some of my cousins who stayed with her were there and that they looked worried, and afraid. I did not go though. I was in town with a friend but that is only an excuse. I could have taken a bus down but I did not. Instead, I took a bus back home.
From the point when I got news of her hospitalisation to the point when my mother returned and told me about her condition, I was not all that worried about her. Although I did try to find out how she was, I did not have the sense of urgency to want to know. I mean, you will be worried about your own grandmother, right?
After I found out that she was ok but will be hospitalised for a few days, I thought that me and my sister should visit her. However, the key word is "should". I feel that I just did not have the genuine desire to want to go and visit her. It was more of an obligation or something to do because she is hospitalised. I don't know. This is the second time she is hospitalised this year. I thought that I should visit her the last time too.
It may be because we only meet less than 5 times a year. It may be that we don't converse much even when we meet but these are all excuses. That lady has been there since I was born. She has been there everytime I visited my uncle's place. I should at least feel more for her.
Maybe I am talking so much about it because there is some emotional attachment with her. Maybe this emotional attachment only comes because I have thought so much. I don't know.. Oh well......
The Origin. 6/12/2006 06:11:00 pm